View Full Version : Who will Bush throw the opening day pitch to?

03-29-2008, 04:01 PM

The Washington Nationals Decide Not To Totally Embarrass President Bush

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You may remember earlier this week that our commander-in-chief was going to be in a bit of an awkward position on Sunday night. He had been slated to throw out the opening pitch to begin the non-Japanese baseball season. The hilarious thing was that he was going to be throwing the opening pitch to Paul Lo Duca (http://www.sportsbybrooks.com/george-w-bush-to-toss-first-pitch-to-suspected-steroid-user-16814), who was mentioned in the Mitchell Report a whopping 37 times.

Of course we all know there was no way this could possibly happen. After all Bush reminded us in a past State of the Union speech how much he hates steroids. So much so that when he owned the Texas Rangers he employed Ivan Rodriguez, Juan Gonzalez and Jose Canseco. Uh, bad example. But he hates steroids.

So the Nats have relented and decided not to make Bush look any stupider than he already looks at this point - even though I'm not sure that's possible.

Yesterday, General Manager Jim Bowden informed Lo Duca that the honor instead will go to Manager Manny Acta (http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2008/03/27/AR2008032703151.html). The White House said it played no role in determining who would catch the pitch.

Right. Just like how the White House played no role whatsoever in leaking CIA agent Valerie Plame's name to the public. Oh, wait....


03-29-2008, 04:06 PM

Why doesn't he just go to Arlington? It'll give him another chance to spend some more time in Crawford. :D