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Canada
10-12-2008, 01:03 AM
Does your wife/girlfriend make you do chores during the game? Do you have to do your own laundry? Does she complain when you come home drunk every day? I am here to show you the way!! I live in a garage filled with Chiefs gear, a full bar and beer fridge and Sunday ticket. It is a non stop party at my house and my wife still wants to keep me around. If you have questions about how to make your life easier...let me help. Just post your problems and I will provide you with quick and easy tips to make your everyday life better!!

hermhater
10-12-2008, 01:06 AM
Sir, how can I build my own garage filled with Chiefs gear?

tammietailgator
10-12-2008, 01:06 AM
Does your wife/girlfriend make you do chores during the game? Do you have to do your own laundry? Does she complain when you come home drunk every day? I am here to show you the way!! I live in a garage filled with Chiefs gear, a full bar and beer fridge and Sunday ticket. It is a non stop party at my house and my wife still wants to keep me around. If you have questions about how to make your life easier...let me help. Just post your problems and I will provide you with quick and easy tips to make your everyday life better!!

OK - How do I get david to stop *****ing all the time? :D

hardcorechiefsfan
10-12-2008, 01:09 AM
I'll bite... I would do anything to go to every one of the chiefs' games. But alas, I don't drive or have the money to buy tickets.
Send all donations to Fort Scott, KS.:lol:

Bike
10-12-2008, 01:12 AM
How can I keep this, shall we say, undesirable odor from escaping from my bathroom to the living room? BTW, double-flushing and deodorizers don't seem to work..
Thanks in advance for this thread...

hardcorechiefsfan
10-12-2008, 01:19 AM
How can I keep this, shall we say, undesirable odor from escaping from my bathroom to the living room? BTW, double-flushing and deodorizers don't seem to work..
Thanks in advance for this thread...

Keep a box of wooden matches in the bathroom, when you realize you have stinky poo light a match. It burns all the methane. Trust me, I grew up with a brother who always left the bathroom so stinky that one would pass out. Me and my sisters told him he was living in the barn if he didn't do the match thing.

tammietailgator
10-12-2008, 01:20 AM
How can I keep this, shall we say, undesirable odor from escaping from my bathroom to the living room? BTW, double-flushing and deodorizers don't seem to work..
Thanks in advance for this thread...

Matches! then never speak of this again - sorry canada... I should let you answer this :lol:

Bike
10-12-2008, 01:23 AM
Matches! then never speak of this again - sorry canada... I should let you answer this :lol:
Thanks, Tammie, for taking all this crap in stride...
You're aces in my book!!:bananen_smilies046:

Bike
10-12-2008, 01:25 AM
Matches! then never speak of this again - sorry canada... I should let you answer this :lol:
BTW, I best not use matches in my bathroom. Homeowners insurance too high as it is...

hermhater
10-12-2008, 01:26 AM
It's the sulphur that covers the smell.

Bike
10-12-2008, 01:30 AM
It's the sulphur that covers the smell.
Good info! Thanks!! Herm blows.:bananen_smilies046:

tammietailgator
10-12-2008, 01:32 AM
Life is pretty good, off and on! but thats ok!:bananen_smilies046:

Canada
10-12-2008, 09:38 AM
Sir, how can I build my own garage filled with Chiefs gear?

First off...when you watch a Chiefs game, make sure you invite your biggest loudest and drunkest friends over to watch the game with you. Then you have to drink all day and well into the late game making as much noise as possible so that when you suggest a TV in the garage, she is more that happy to say OK.

As far as decorating, make sure to cover your house is an extremely tacky way (in your wifes/gf opinion). I am talking Chiefs flags hanging off the roof and lown ornaments, decals on the windows etc... eventually she will get so annoyed that you can make the deal that you get all you Chiefs stuff out of the house but you get to do whatever you want with the garage!!

Hope this helps!! :bananen_smilies046:

Canada
10-12-2008, 09:41 AM
How can I keep this, shall we say, undesirable odor from escaping from my bathroom to the living room? BTW, double-flushing and deodorizers don't seem to work..
Thanks in advance for this thread...

I have the best way but you have to smoke some pot for it to work. First you takean emptry toilet paper roll. Then you take a dryer sheet and put it over the end of the roll and secure it with an elastic. Now when you are doing your business, all you have to do is smoke a big ol' fatty and blow the smoke through the dryer sheet. It will come out smelling like Spring Breeze ar whatever type dryer sheet you have. And excess smells will handled easily and pleasantly.

Now go get a beer for those pasties!! :bananen_smilies046:

Canada
10-12-2008, 09:42 AM
OK - How do I get david to stop *****ing all the time? :D

I am not sure what *****ing is?

Canada
10-12-2008, 09:43 AM
Keep a box of wooden matches in the bathroom, when you realize you have stinky poo light a match. It burns all the methane. Trust me, I grew up with a brother who always left the bathroom so stinky that one would pass out. Me and my sisters told him he was living in the barn if he didn't do the match thing.


Matches! then never speak of this again - sorry canada... I should let you answer this :lol:


It's the sulphur that covers the smell.

Ladies...this is Canada's Corner!!

tammietailgator
10-12-2008, 12:05 PM
Ladies...this is Canada's Corner!!

I said I was sorry!

Next question: What to do on bye Sunday?

Canada
10-12-2008, 01:17 PM
I said I was sorry!

Next question: What to do on bye Sunday?

Drink a lot of beer! :bananen_smilies046:

hardcorechiefsfan
10-12-2008, 06:35 PM
Ladies...this is Canada's Corner!!

I'm sorry Canada.

IlovetheChiefs
10-12-2008, 10:35 PM
Does your wife/girlfriend make you do chores during the game? Do you have to do your own laundry? Does she complain when you come home drunk every day? I am here to show you the way!! I live in a garage filled with Chiefs gear, a full bar and beer fridge and Sunday ticket. It is a non stop party at my house and my wife still wants to keep me around. If you have questions about how to make your life easier...let me help. Just post your problems and I will provide you with quick and easy tips to make your everyday life better!!

My problem is not having a wife or girlfriend in the first place. So I have to do my own laundry, not because I have a woman that makes me do it, but because I am the only one in the house!

But you are indeed just the man who can help me because you said the other day that I can take your wife if I want her, thank you! :D

hardcorechiefsfan
10-12-2008, 10:49 PM
My problem is not having a wife or girlfriend in the first place. So I have to do my own laundry, not because I have a woman that makes me do it, but because I am the only one in the house!

But you are indeed just the man who can help me because you said the other day that I can take your wife if I want her, thank you! :D

Dear Lord, thank you very much for sending me a single man!

tornadospotter
10-12-2008, 10:53 PM
My problem is not having a wife or girlfriend in the first place. So I have to do my own laundry, not because I have a woman that makes me do it, but because I am the only one in the house!

But you are indeed just the man who can help me because you said the other day that I can take your wife if I want her, thank you! :D
Yeah right..........................
Canada is too wise to give up that prize of a wife!!!!!





How he ever found her, and able to keep her, I do not know. :lol: :D

Bike
10-12-2008, 10:54 PM
I have the best way but you have to smoke some pot for it to work. First you takean emptry toilet paper roll. Then you take a dryer sheet and put it over the end of the roll and secure it with an elastic. Now when you are doing your business, all you have to do is smoke a big ol' fatty and blow the smoke through the dryer sheet. It will come out smelling like Spring Breeze ar whatever type dryer sheet you have. And excess smells will handled easily and pleasantly.

Now go get a beer for those pasties!! :bananen_smilies046:
Wow. That is simply amazing advise. But with all the piss-testing at my work, I can't partake in the consumption of doob. And I doubt that an empty toilet paper roll with a dryer sheet on it will hold all my poop.
I am open for other suggestions..Thanks

IlovetheChiefs
10-12-2008, 11:00 PM
Yeah right..........................
Canada is too wise to give up that prize of a wife!!!!!


I knew it was too good to be true. Love is always such an elusive thing. (David Lee Roth's Just a gigolo song now comes to mind yet again).

Oh for a woman to nag me and complain, heh heh!

tornadospotter
10-12-2008, 11:06 PM
I knew it was too good to be true. Love is always such an elusive thing. (David Lee Roth's Just a gigolo song now comes to mind yet again).

Oh for a woman to nag me and complain, heh heh!
Carefull what you wish for. You might get it!!!!!:D

IlovetheChiefs
10-12-2008, 11:15 PM
Carefull what you wish for. You might get it!!!!!:D

Very true very true. The grass looks greener on the other side, Can't live with em' can't live without em' etc. haha

Naw, I want to tie the knot. But at least in the meantime can enjoy my freedom while I have it :D

Wski Girl
10-12-2008, 11:30 PM
O wise one,
How do I get my father in laws girlfriend to start watching a good football team instead of the donkeys?
:) but on a good note, I finally recieved my Hall chiefs jersey!!

tornadospotter
10-12-2008, 11:31 PM
Very true very true. The grass looks greener on the other side, Can't live with em' can't live without em' etc. haha

Naw, I want to tie the knot. But at least in the meantime can enjoy my freedom while I have it :D

Well it does come with some benefits!:D But also some expense, Ok a lot of expense, and loss of some freedom, Ok most all freedom. But there are benefits! Just can't remember what just now.:D
I got married right out of high school, we just celebrated out 25th this year, I have been so out numbered, I have 3 children all girls, all our pets were female also, dogs, cats and I do not know how to tell, but dang sure every fish we had was female!!!!! But the Tide is turning, My oldest daughter is married to a great guy, so I have a son now, they have been blessed with a son, :yahoo: a grandson for me, so the males are taking back the family! Finally! :11:

IlovetheChiefs
10-12-2008, 11:40 PM
Wow big congratulations tornadospotter on your 25th anniversary!!!!

And see my signature picture of Len Dawson? This was in 1976. He had been married for over 20 years. And see how big he is smiling! :D

And Canada has a wife and he recently titled a thread, "I am happy". :D

Congrats again, ts. :)

Canada
10-13-2008, 12:52 AM
My problem is not having a wife or girlfriend in the first place. So I have to do my own laundry, not because I have a woman that makes me do it, but because I am the only one in the house!

But you are indeed just the man who can help me because you said the other day that I can take your wife if I want her, thank you! :D

Send me an address and she is on her way!! :bananen_smilies046:

Canada
10-13-2008, 12:54 AM
Wow. That is simply amazing advise. But with all the piss-testing at my work, I can't partake in the consumption of doob. And I doubt that an empty toilet paper roll with a dryer sheet on it will hold all my poop.
I am open for other suggestions..Thanks

PM me and I can help u get arond the piss test!!:D Maybe I was not clear on the instructions but you don't poop in the toilet paper roll!! :lol:

Canada
10-13-2008, 12:55 AM
Yeah right..........................
Canada is too wise to give up that prize of a wife!!!!!

Yeah, but I don't mind lending her out for a while!! :D





How he ever found her, and able to keep her, I do not know. :lol: :D

You got that baKCwards...she is a b-lls fan and I am a Chiefs fan. You need to ask how she got me and kept me!! LuKCy lady!! :bananen_smilies046:

royalswin100games
10-13-2008, 01:03 AM
Canada!

I'm going to have some questions when I go through my emergency medicine rotation at my advanced specialty school. Can I count on assistance? I also would like you to ship some of the secret stash brew you have up there to me. :bananen_smilies046:

Canada
10-13-2008, 01:06 AM
Canada!

I'm going to have some questions when I go through my emergency medicine rotation at my advanced specialty school. Can I count on assistance? I also would like you to ship some of the secret stash brew you have up there to me. :bananen_smilies046:

Absolutely, I will PM you my E mail if you need anything just ask!! :bananen_smilies046:

tornadospotter
10-13-2008, 01:32 AM
You got that baKCwards...she is a b-lls fan and I am a Chiefs fan. You need to ask how she got me and kept me!! LuKCy lady!! :bananen_smilies046:
Yeah right..........................
Canada is too wise to give up that prize of a wife!!!!!

Yeah, but I don't mind lending her out for a while!! :D


I do not belive that at all!


How he ever found her, and able to keep her, I do not know. :lol: :D
You got that baKCwards...she is a b-lls fan and I am a Chiefs fan. You need to ask how she got me and kept me!! LuKCy lady!! :bananen_smilies046:
But this makes me wonder!!! No way, she is not a name to not be mentioned, team fan!

tammietailgator
10-13-2008, 02:45 AM
PM me and I can help u get arond the piss test!!:D Maybe I was not clear on the instructions but you don't poop in the toilet paper roll!! :lol:

:lol:

tammietailgator
10-13-2008, 02:52 AM
Well it does come with some benefits!:D But also some expense, Ok a lot of expense, and loss of some freedom, Ok most all freedom. But there are benefits! Just can't remember what just now.:D
I got married right out of high school, we just celebrated out 25th this year, I have been so out numbered, I have 3 children all girls, all our pets were female also, dogs, cats and I do not know how to tell, but dang sure every fish we had was female!!!!! But the Tide is turning, My oldest daughter is married to a great guy, so I have a son now, they have been blessed with a son, :yahoo: a grandson for me, so the males are taking back the family! Finally! :11:

I met your women and they are great! :yahoo:

:yahoo:I wish you three lots of luck! :D

hermhater
10-13-2008, 02:57 AM
Sir, how should I cool my beer?

Should I have 2 or 3 beers in the fridge at any given point?

tornadospotter
10-13-2008, 03:01 AM
I met your women and they are great! :yahoo:

:yahoo:I wish you three lots of luck! :D
Thanks, I need it!!!!!, Yes they are great!!!!! They put up with me!!!!!!:D But I am a sweet heart, just ask me!

Canada
10-13-2008, 10:29 AM
Sir, how should I cool my beer?

Should I have 2 or 3 beers in the fridge at any given point?Minimum of 6 in the freezer and at least 18 in the fridge. :bananen_smilies046:

jtandcrew
10-13-2008, 10:49 AM
Thanks, I need it!!!!!, Yes they are great!!!!! They put up with me!!!!!!:D But I am a sweet heart, just ask me!

GL with the man v woman thing! Before you get everything equal on the sex ratio. Try this....it works for me....

You tell the women you want to talk about your feeling about any subject. It doesnt matter what it is. Once you guys get their full attention? Thats when you lay down the law about whatever you guys are wanting to do. (ok, I said this works for me but tbh, only a few times, but I still try)! :lol:


Minimum of 6 in the freezer and at least 18 in the fridge. :bananen_smilies046:

Your my hero! :lol: :drunkhb: :toast2: :yahoo: :bananen_smilies046:

Bike
10-13-2008, 02:10 PM
PM me and I can help u get arond the piss test!!:D Maybe I was not clear on the instructions but you don't poop in the toilet paper roll!! :lol:
Damn it, man. I knew I had to have done something wrong!!! What a mess!!!!:bananen_smilies046:

Wski Girl
10-13-2008, 02:13 PM
:lol:

Canada
10-13-2008, 07:26 PM
Damn it, man. I knew I had to have done something wrong!!! What a mess!!!!:bananen_smilies046:

That's OK, just throw a towel over it and walk away. When you wife discovers it...deny deny deny!! :bananen_smilies046:

IlovetheChiefs
10-13-2008, 08:23 PM
Dear Canada,

I see sir that your wife is a Fubbalo fan and you, of course, are a Chiefs man. Therefore you would deem it totally safe and acceptable for me to take a Philadelphia Eagles fan for a wife, righto? That's good because the odds are that any local woman around here would be just that.

But did you once say you would draw the line at a woman who likes the Faders? So can I feel free to date any woman regardless of fan affiliation with the one exception being a Jokeland fan?

And if I may ask a bonus question: Is it advisable to:
(A) play hard to get
(B) show the woman you're crazy about her
(C) a little mix of both

Thank you kind sir. (I was going to say thank you kind guru but don't want people to think I'm addressing the mod here, heh heh).

Canada
10-13-2008, 08:57 PM
It is absolutely OK to date/marry a Philly fan. At all the important times she should not be wearing any Philly stuff (or anything else for that matter) No sense in limiting yourself based on football team preference. Besides, half the fun is trying to convert her. My wife claims to be a fubbalo fan but you can walk in my house at any given time and she will be wearing a Chiefs hat, T Shirt, sweater etc....


As far as your bonus question goes I would have to say it depends on the woman. Some like to be showered with gifts affection etc, others maybe not as much. I guess C would be the best answer but you have to play it by ear. Women need the affection as well as the time to themselves. If you can find that balance you will be the guy they are loking for!! Good Luck!!

IlovetheChiefs
10-13-2008, 09:44 PM
Yes I gather from what some say now that it depends on the woman; some like the challenge of a man playing hard to get, others find it a turn off and get discouraged when that happens. Best to feel it out. If a woman backs off from attention then playing hard to get may be in order. If she welcomes and delights in it then full speed ahead (unless she suddenly switches to distance mode again! I know wavering can occur without warning! But even then it's not necessarily personal but rather could simply be a mood swing they are going through at the moment. Tricky to discern at times!).

And yes I can see how about 75% women around here are Eagle fans who can be converted because it is a rather token thing and because their family and friends like the Eagles. But the other 25% (like this one woman I adore. loving the Eagles is her only fault!) are solid Eagle fans who would have as little likelihood of converting as us guys would!

My fiancee I had before didn't care much for sports so that was easy getting her to be fine with the Chiefs because she knew I like them.

Another excellent entry from CC (Canada's corner) at the CC (Chiefs Crowd)!

Canada
10-13-2008, 09:52 PM
Or you could do what i did. Get her pregnant! :) oops

Best mistake I ever made!!

IlovetheChiefs
10-13-2008, 10:00 PM
Or you could do what i did. Get her pregnant! :) oops

Best mistake I ever made!!

Hey that's an idea, bring an EAGLET into the picture, heh! :p

Canada
10-13-2008, 10:41 PM
Hey that's an idea, bring an EAGLET into the picture, heh! :p

Chieflet

Bike
10-14-2008, 12:12 AM
Very true very true. The grass looks greener on the other side, Can't live with em' can't live without em' etc. haha

Naw, I want to tie the knot. But at least in the meantime can enjoy my freedom while I have it :D
No, its: Women-can't live with 'em, pass the beer nuts.:bananen_smilies046:

hardcorechiefsfan
10-14-2008, 12:17 AM
No, its: Women-can't live with 'em, pass the beer nuts.:bananen_smilies046:

Of course you can't live without us. Who would make sure you are wearing clean underwear instead of ones with racing stripes from when you had to gas out everyone with the raunchiest farts?

Bike
10-14-2008, 12:18 AM
PM me and I can help u get arond the piss test!!:D Maybe I was not clear on the instructions but you don't poop in the toilet paper roll!! :lol:
Man is my face red.

Bike
10-14-2008, 12:32 AM
Of course you can't live without us. Who would make sure you are wearing clean underwear instead of ones with racing stripes from when you had to gas out everyone with the raunchiest farts?
My wife won't get near my underwear. After a days' use, I just sub 'em out as toilet paper and flush 'em.
But if I'm on the road, I have to improvise. I usually just turn 'em inside out! Fresh shorts!!

Canada
10-14-2008, 02:51 AM
Of course you can't live without us. Who would make sure you are wearing clean underwear instead of ones with racing stripes from when you had to gas out everyone with the raunchiest farts?

If it wasn't for women, no one would care about clean underwear!

AkChief49
10-14-2008, 09:20 AM
Man is my face red.:lol::lol:you're trying too hard!!!:D:D

Bike
10-14-2008, 12:16 PM
:lol::lol:you're trying too hard!!!:D:D
Thats too funny!!:yahoo: Give me fiber!!!!!

IlovetheChiefs
10-27-2008, 08:52 PM
Canada, what if the Phillies win the World Series tonight? Will my city still be in one piece? You see, Philly hasn't seen a sports championship since 1983 (76ers) and the fans are HUNGRY (and nuts!). I know Detroit and SF had problems in the past with overzealous fans rioting and vandalizing. And Philadelphia fans have a certain extreme fanaticism and intensity that makes me concerned.

Well to everyone: If the Phillies win and my city goes down in flames, it was nice knowing you and I'll still cheer for the Chiefs in spirit!! :yahoo:

Canada
10-27-2008, 08:55 PM
Canada, what if the Phillies win the World Series tonight? Will my city still be in one piece? You see, Philly hasn't seen a sports championship since 1983 (76ers) and the fans are HUNGRY (and nuts!). I know Detroit and SF had problems in the past with overzealous fans rioting and vandalizing. And Philadelphia fans have a certain extreme fanaticism and intensity that makes me concerned.

Well to everyone: If the Phillies win and my city goes down in flames, it was nice knowing you and I'll still cheer for the Chiefs in spirit!! :yahoo:

No, it will not remain in one piece so grab a nice cold frosty one and join in the fun!! :bananen_smilies046: However in the ensuing party, the Philadelphia Eagles stadium will burn to the ground and Philly fans will look to you "The Wise One" for direction and you can convert them all!! :D:D

IlovetheChiefs
10-27-2008, 09:05 PM
No, it will not remain in one piece so grab a nice cold frosty one and join in the fun!! :bananen_smilies046: However in the ensuing party, the Philadelphia Eagles stadium will burn to the ground and Philly fans will look to you "The Wise One" for direction and you can convert them all!! :D:D

Just grabbed a cool forsty one as a matter of fact! (A root beer, mmmmmmmmm!)

And hey thanks, a Phillies title can lead to my converting this to Chiefs city!!

One of the Phillies players even said if they win tonight the city will be bedlam. Here's what bedlam means:

1. a scene or state of wild uproar and confusion. 2. an insane asylum or madhouse.

All I can say to that is GO TAMPA BAY RAYS!!!!!!! :yahoo:

Sadly, I have to get up early for work tomorrow on top of all this. So even if my house and nieghborhood remains in one PIECE, I anticipate not having enough PEACE and quiet overnight while trying to sleep! They shot off fireworks after the Phillies won the game to get to the WS. I can only imagine the noise level after tonight. Plus some people at work were talking about calling out tomorrow so they can go to the parade. Great. We'll be shorthanded, I'll have extra work to do and be tired while doing it. GO RAYS! (And CHIEFS!!!!)

tammietailgator
10-27-2008, 09:33 PM
Go Phillies!!!!

Hehe... kidding - but have fun with it!!! And if the Chiefs ever win the superbowl, I expect your home to be in total bedlam! :D

IlovetheChiefs
10-28-2008, 06:15 AM
Go Phillies!!!!

Hehe... kidding - but have fun with it!!! And WHEN the Chiefs win the superbowl I expect your home to be in total bedlam! :D

FYP there heh! And you got it!

The rain delayed the Series and so I get to survive at least another day, yay. And it's 2-2 in the 6th so hey those Rays just may win yet and force it back to Florida.:drunkhb:

chiefnationrepresentarmy
10-28-2008, 03:28 PM
Hello room,

Just passing the time waiting to catch my plane to KC. i got some KC power coming in from Cali and Ft Bragg NC. I will be attending my first Arrowhead Game this weekend and am pumped up for the Game!! Just arrived back on US soil in April after a 15 month tour in a four letter country and am bringing the Power of the 82nd Airborne with me to the game!!! I have seen the CHIEFS play numerous times on the road but said enough is enough and I decided to board a plane and get out to Arrowhead and put my faith in KC Nation to pull our boys through. I also have my brother who is a die hard as well flying in from california, so we can bring the love from both coasts to KC. Go CHIEFS!!!!! I'll be sporting the 72 jersey this weekend to hopefully get dorsey off his back and into the backfield and get the D-line Rolling. look forward to the whole Arrowhead experience. see you all at the game.

gotta love the sign i had at Arizona.

it was leinart's first start.

tammietailgator
10-28-2008, 04:59 PM
Hello room,

Just passing the time waiting to catch my plane to KC. i got some KC power coming in from Cali and Ft Bragg NC. I will be attending my first Arrowhead Game this weekend and am pumped up for the Game!! Just arrived back on US soil in April after a 15 month tour in a four letter country and am bringing the Power of the 82nd Airborne with me to the game!!! I have seen the CHIEFS play numerous times on the road but said enough is enough and I decided to board a plane and get out to Arrowhead and put my faith in KC Nation to pull our boys through. I also have my brother who is a die hard as well flying in from california, so we can bring the love from both coasts to KC. Go CHIEFS!!!!! I'll be sporting the 72 jersey this weekend to hopefully get dorsey off his back and into the backfield and get the D-line Rolling. look forward to the whole Arrowhead experience. see you all at the game.

gotta love the sign i had at Arizona.

it was leinart's first start.

:yahoo:Welcome back!! And welcome to KC this weekend! I do not think that there is enough thank you's for everything that you have done for us and our country! Wish I was going to the game! Have a blast!:bananen_smilies046:

chiefnationrepresentarmy
10-28-2008, 05:24 PM
I will have a blast and thanks for the post! i appreciate it. GO RED!

chief31
10-29-2008, 01:27 AM
Long time, no see. I hope you have a great time at Arrowhead this weekend.

I missed out on my scheduled trip to the home opener. So I am going to be plenty jealous of you.:D

hermhater
01-01-2009, 06:56 PM
Your corner is empty Canada.

It needs beer.

http://roberdo.com/wp-content/uploads/2006/10/beer.jpg

tornadospotter
01-05-2009, 12:51 PM
Canada, can you help me with my gift shopping? This one did not work out so well. :D


**** TOILET FOR TWO ****

Date: 2008-11-06, 9:20PM PST

I have come to the conclusion that I must sell my TwoDaLoo, and that saddens me. I purchased this baby for my wife. Well, it was our 4 year plus some, ok, a lot more years, anniversary and I really wanted to give her something special, something that I put a lot of thought into, and most importantly something we could do together. I thought what better thing to do together than to poo together. After countless hours of research I found The TwoDaLoo. The TwoDaLoo is billed as the world's first toilet two people can use ... at the exact same time. It's supposed to bring couples closer together and conserves our water supply all with one flush. My wife was disgusted and has since left me. I explained to her that we could be as one if we could rock a big one out together. I can't think of a better way to end a romantic dinner out. And how cool would Taco Tuesday have been – had she been just a little more open minded. It's just not the same when you use it alone – and the empty seat next to me just reminds me of her.
The TwoDaLoo features two side-by-side toilet seats with a modest privacy wall in between. I purchased the upgraded version; you know the one that includes a seven inch LCD television and iPod docking station. I will provide my personal play list (should you choose to by her) – songs like "I'm Coming Out" and "You Dropped a Bomb on me" and "Love Stinks" will be just a few.
I truly hope that someone can use my T for T (toilet for two) and find the happiness that I was so looking for.

spiman
01-05-2009, 07:11 PM
:bananen_smilies046: :funnypost:

Canada
01-05-2009, 07:55 PM
Maybe she left cause you got the wrong version

http://www.chiefscrowd.com/forums/images/imported/2009/01/2.jpg

Chiefster
01-05-2009, 08:11 PM
Does your wife/girlfriend make you do chores during the game? Do you have to do your own laundry? Does she complain when you come home drunk every day? I am here to show you the way!! I live in a garage filled with Chiefs gear, a full bar and beer fridge and Sunday ticket. It is a non stop party at my house and my wife still wants to keep me around. If you have questions about how to make your life easier...let me help. Just post your problems and I will provide you with quick and easy tips to make your everyday life better!!

Leave it to my good friend Canada to provide yet another invaluable service. :D

Bike
04-28-2009, 10:28 AM
Canada, I need some advice on what to give my wife on Mothers day. Must be cheap, but not flowers. They're dead in 2 days...

Canada
04-28-2009, 10:28 AM
Canada, I need some advice on what to give my wife on Mothers day. Must be cheap, but not flowers. They're dead in 2 days...

She like beer? If not, picture of the kids in one of those sappy picture frames!! Probably cost you about $20

http://www.personalizationmall.com/cat_image/2598-C1.jpg

But the beer u get to share!!

Bike
04-28-2009, 10:40 AM
She like beer? If not, picture of the kids in one of those sappy picture frames!! Probably cost you about $20

http://www.chiefscrowd.com/forums/images/imported/2009/04/69.jpg

But the beer u get to share!!
Off to Wal-mart I go. Thanks for the help.:bananen_smilies046:

Bike
04-28-2009, 10:45 AM
This thread really needs to be stickied. Thanks.

tornadospotter
04-28-2009, 11:47 AM
Dang it Mothers day! Ok when is mothers day, and why should I have to do anything for my wife? She is not, my mother.





just my at home boss

Canada
04-28-2009, 12:18 PM
Dang it Mothers day! Ok when is mothers day, and why should I have to do anything for my wife? She is not, my mother.





just my at home boss

My wifes Birthday is the same weekend as mothers day!! :yahoo: One present two occasions covered!! Extra Beer money!! :yahoo:

N TX Dave
04-28-2009, 01:28 PM
My wifes Birthday is the same weekend as mothers day!! :yahoo: One present two occasions covered!! Extra Beer money!! :yahoo:

You think you got it made my wife's birthday and my daugther's birthday and mother's day are the same week. In fact my daughter was born on Mother's day thirty some years ago. One going out meal and one party and three events.

:bananen_smilies046: :yahoo:

Canada
04-28-2009, 01:44 PM
You think you got it made my wife's birthday and my daugther's birthday and mother's day are the same week. In fact my daughter was born on Mother's day thirty some years ago. One going out meal and one party and three events.

:bananen_smilies046: :yahoo:

Nice, my oldest daughter is two weeks after the wife, then the youngest is two weeks after her. I call it the birthday gauntlet because its fathers day and my b day at the end of it all!! As long as I do well, I get left alone with a lot of beer for my holidays!! :bananen_smilies046:

GlennBree
04-28-2009, 11:48 PM
Lets be clear here...I'm the one asking my husband for MORE chiefs gear!!! (He did hang the very large, very nice photo of Arrowhead over our new 65"tv...of which I wanted for watching the chiefs)....:D

I'm also secretly stashing money away to pay for a trip to Arrowhead for our anniversary in October!!! (Reminder....that's where we went on our honeymoon)...

The more Chiefs gear I have, the happier I am!!! :yahoo: :yahoo: :yahoo: :yahoo: :yahoo: :yahoo: :yahoo: :yahoo: :yahoo:

Canada
04-29-2009, 12:23 AM
Lets be clear here...I'm the one asking my husband for MORE chiefs gear!!! (He did hang the very large, very nice photo of Arrowhead over our new 65"tv...of which I wanted for watching the chiefs)....:D

I'm also secretly stashing money away to pay for a trip to Arrowhead for our anniversary in October!!! (Reminder....that's where we went on our honeymoon)...

The more Chiefs gear I have, the happier I am!!! :yahoo: :yahoo: :yahoo: :yahoo: :yahoo: :yahoo:

Listen, u look like a pretty lady and I have a lot of Chiefs stuff so if things don't work out with Glen, my wife would be more than ahppy to get rid of me!! call me....289-549-3541 (that is not my real # dor all those who would get worried) PM me for my real #. I'm drunk!! :bananen_smilies046:

honda522
04-29-2009, 01:00 AM
How can I get a good girlfreind? :p

Or get the old one back :(?

Vanilla Garilla
04-29-2009, 01:05 AM
How can I get a good girlfreind? :p

When you find one worthwhile, treat her very poorly. Woman love being treated like crap. Just Kidding....

Or get the old one back :(?

Call up your old one, and tell her how well your doing, and how your having the time of your life. She will be wanting you back like crazy. Not Kidding.

I have an awesome wife, and all my friends wanna know why, so when they ask I tell them a few things:

1. Do whatever she asks of you, and when you ask her something and she says whatever, or its up to you, that means NO!

2. You have to be good in the sack, which means you must know how to eat ; ) Im a big guy, so it was easy for me.

3. Keep your teeth nice, my wife has always told me that my smile is the reason I got her.

Vanilla Garilla
04-29-2009, 01:06 AM
Listen, u look like a pretty lady and I have a lot of Chiefs stuff so if things don't work out with Glen, my wife would be more than ahppy to get rid of me!! call me....289-549-3541 (that is not my real # dor all those who would get worried) PM me for my real #. I'm drunk!! :bananen_smilies046:

Wow, ive heard of drunk dialing, and texting, but now we have a new one, drunk posting folks.:toast2:

honda522
04-29-2009, 01:15 AM
Call up your old one, and tell her how well your doing, and how your having the time of your life. She will be wanting you back like crazy. Not Kidding.

I have an awesome wife, and all my friends wanna know why, so when they ask I tell them a few things:

1. Do whatever she asks of you, and when you ask her something and she says whatever, or its up to you, that means NO!

2. You have to be good in the sack, which means you must know how to eat ; ) Im a big guy, so it was easy for me.

3. Keep your teeth nice, my wife has always told me that my smile is the reason I got her.

She ain't coming back.

Its hard to find the right girl in this city.

Vanilla Garilla
04-29-2009, 01:23 AM
She ain't coming back.

Its hard to find the right girl in this city.


Thats what my cousin who lives there is always telling me when I ask him about it. You would think with all that population, it would be easier. I don't know, but when I lived over in Overland Park I had fine females galore, and I only stayed there for a few months.

honda522
04-29-2009, 01:30 AM
Thats what my cousin who lives there is always telling me when I ask him about it. You would think with all that population, it would be easier. I don't know, but when I lived over in Overland Park I had fine females galore, and I only stayed there for a few months.
Its not that there isn't any, but I am looking for the right one, not used ones.

Hayvern
04-29-2009, 02:52 AM
She ain't coming back.

Its hard to find the right girl in this city.

After 23 years of marriage, I think I know a couple things about this subject.

To find a good woman, you have to know what you are looking for, and be serious about it. You are likely going to be disappointed if you go after the super model.

Next, once you get her, you have to do a few things to keep her. Vanilla was right, for a start, but after a while, those rules start to change. Sure, she wants you to be good in the sack, but that starts going away after awhile.

For me it has been:


Stop posting on Chiefs Crowd when she wants to talk.
Take time to experience things with your kids. This really works well if things are not going so well in bed. If you have little ones, spending time with the kids and nurturing them is the best way to open the wife up.
Of course, you always do what she wants.
Admit that you are not the boss of the house, actually, admit that you are not the boss of anything, wives do not like to be in the backseat, so if you publically admit to your friends, just how non-macho you are, then you are set.
Ask for directions once in a while, even if you don't need them, actually, ask HER for directions once in a while, but never ask for directions on how to wash the clothes or the dishes.
and lastly, never fart in bed, not matter how much you might like your own brand, she has no appreciation for it.

Canada
04-29-2009, 09:21 AM
...or do what I did. Find a girl and get her knocked up then go to Australia!!

Bike
04-29-2009, 10:55 AM
...or do what I did. Find a girl and get her knocked up then go to Australia!!
Did you take her with you?:lol:

Canada
04-29-2009, 12:40 PM
Did you take her with you?:lol:

Nope, she found me 4 months later, drunk and sleeping on a sidewalk in Toronto!!! Lukcy lady!! :D

GlennBree
04-29-2009, 12:42 PM
:beer: :beer: :beer: :beer: :beer: :beer: :beer: :beer:

honda522
04-29-2009, 01:00 PM
Dam Canada, you sound like a lucky guy.

GlennBree
04-29-2009, 01:24 PM
Nope, she found me 4 months later, drunk and sleeping on a sidewalk in Toronto!!! Lukcy lady!! :D

That's a very sweet story!! Canada is now also known as "Sleeping Beauty" !!! :D

Canada
04-29-2009, 01:53 PM
That's a very sweet story!! Canada is now also known as "Sleeping Beauty" !!! :D

I was certainly a beauty. I had just finished a 4 month backpacking tour of Australia and I drank free on the 48 hour flight back home to Canada. I had my first beer in Melbourne Australia and then I flew to Sydney and had a few there, then drank on the plane to Japan (accidentaly drank a bunch of Saki) but mostly beer, then I stayed a partied with a bunch of strangers from Russia, Germany and Aus, then I flew to Chicago (where I forgot about the 12 hour time difference) 9pm was actually 9am when I stumbled into customs hammered!! Had a cold one and flew to Toronto, figuring my girlfriend at the time (now my wife) and my buddy who were picking me up would look for me at the bar. I watched them drive by a few times while I was drinkin', so I finally went outside to wait (in December) and passed out on my bag of clothes and that is where she found me!! The end of my longest drinking binge. Halfway around the world!!:bananen_smilies046: Everything I have done since has beenan impovement in her eyes!! :)

I also watched MNF in Japanese!!

GlennBree
04-29-2009, 02:25 PM
That is a GREAT story without a doubt!! :bananen_smilies046:

AkChief49
04-29-2009, 10:48 PM
I was certainly a beauty. I had just finished a 4 month backpacking tour of Australia and I drank free on the 48 hour flight back home to Canada. I had my first beer in Melbourne Australia and then I flew to Sydney and had a few there, then drank on the plane to Japan (accidentaly drank a bunch of Saki) but mostly beer, then I stayed a partied with a bunch of strangers from Russia, Germany and Aus, then I flew to Chicago (where I forgot about the 12 hour time difference) 9pm was actually 9am when I stumbled into customs hammered!! Had a cold one and flew to Toronto, figuring my girlfriend at the time (now my wife) and my buddy who were picking me up would look for me at the bar. I watched them drive by a few times while I was drinkin', so I finally went outside to wait (in December) and passed out on my bag of clothes and that is where she found me!! The end of my longest drinking binge. Halfway around the world!!:bananen_smilies046: Everything I have done since has beenan impovement in her eyes!! :)

!I also watched MNF in Japanese!
I watched the Skins and Dolphins in the superbowl in Tokyo('83) and yes I had had a few.....long time ago:D

Hayvern
04-30-2009, 01:44 AM
When I was in the Navy, I left Guam at 9:00PM on my Birthday, we had already been partying all day in celebration so I was pretty drunk.

We continued to drink on the plane, I guess the Navy figured that a bunch of drunken seabees were better then sober ones when returning from a 9 month deployment, so drinks were free.

Touched down in California at 9:00AM on my birthday, decided that it was time to party for my birthday again. Had to be one of the longest drunks 36 hours, that I have ever been on. Never quite had the reason to do it again.

rbedgood
04-30-2009, 02:14 AM
Spring Break 1994...Lake Havasu...'nuff said.

pbatrucker
04-30-2009, 06:19 AM
Spring Break 1994...Lake Havasu...'nuff said.
:D SO, YOU WERE THE ONE KEEPING ME AWAKE!!!:yahoo:

AussieChiefsFan
04-30-2009, 06:29 AM
:D SO, YOU WERE THE ONE KEEPING ME AWAKE!!!:yahoo:
:lol:

Canada
04-30-2009, 10:13 AM
:D SO, YOU WERE THE ONE KEEPING ME AWAKE!!!:yahoo:

I didn't know u guys went that way!! :D

Vanilla Garilla
04-30-2009, 11:46 AM
I didn't know u guys went that way!! :D

Wow, I feel like I just walked in on something. Err, I should probably go now.

tornadospotter
04-30-2009, 12:31 PM
:running::scared2:

hermhater
07-12-2009, 04:32 PM
Where the hell's the video of the tattoo?

Canada
07-12-2009, 05:10 PM
On the video camera

hermhater
07-12-2009, 06:29 PM
A lot of good that does me.

Canada
07-12-2009, 06:37 PM
I never said it to help you.

hermhater
07-12-2009, 07:30 PM
You should be more considerate.

It's people like you that make me want to tip.

Canada
07-12-2009, 08:50 PM
Its people like you that bug the sh!t outta me.

hermhater
07-12-2009, 09:08 PM
My cat says otherwise.