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Thread: The Chiefs Crowd Official Joke Thread

  1. #1
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    Default The Chiefs Crowd Official Joke Thread


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    There is a chiefs picture forum. Why not a Joke Forum? It is always a pain trying to weed out all of the jokes in a single thread specially when there are thread whores who swurve the thread.

  2. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by hermhater View Post




    Get with the times old man!


    Hey! You can't beat the classics!


  3. #12
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    How many men does it take to open a beer?
    None. It should be opened when she brings it.
    -------------------------------------------------------------------
    Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
    Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.
    --------------------------------------------------------------------
    Why do women have smaller feet than men?
    It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows
    Them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
    -------- --------------------------------------- --------------------
    How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
    When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me..."
    -------------------------------------------------------------------
    How do you fix a woman's watch?
    You don't. There is a clock on the oven.
    -------------------------------------------------------------------
    Why do men pass gas more than women?
    Because women can't shut up long enough to
    Build up the required pressure.
    -------------------------------------------------------------------
    If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
    The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
    -------------------------------------------------------------------
    What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?
    A woman who won't do what she's told
    -------------------------------------------------------------------
    I married a Miss Right.
    I just didn't know her first name was Always.
    -------------------------------------------------------------------
    Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%.
    It's called a Wedding Cake.
    ---------------------------------------------! ----------------------
    Why do men die before their wives?
    They want to.

  4. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by Seek View Post
    How many men does it take to open a beer?
    None. It should be opened when she brings it.
    -------------------------------------------------------------------
    Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
    Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.
    --------------------------------------------------------------------
    Why do women have smaller feet than men?
    It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows
    Them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
    -------- --------------------------------------- --------------------
    How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
    When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me..."
    -------------------------------------------------------------------
    How do you fix a woman's watch?
    You don't. There is a clock on the oven.
    -------------------------------------------------------------------
    Why do men pass gas more than women?
    Because women can't shut up long enough to
    Build up the required pressure.
    -------------------------------------------------------------------
    If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
    The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
    -------------------------------------------------------------------
    What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?
    A woman who won't do what she's told
    -------------------------------------------------------------------
    I married a Miss Right.
    I just didn't know her first name was Always.
    -------------------------------------------------------------------
    Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%.
    It's called a Wedding Cake.
    ---------------------------------------------! ----------------------
    Why do men die before their wives?
    They want to.
    Just one question? Are you gay? not that it matters, but just curious

  5. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by tammietailgator View Post
    Just one question? Are you gay? not that it matters, but just curious
    To be honest with your question, and I am sure it is not a popular opinion. I am homophobic. I easily turn up a lip to the obvious flamer and become uncomfortable around them. I don't try to be, they are nice people but I just can't help it.

    That being said I am happily married with a 3 year old die hard Chiefs son with one in the oven, due by year end. A lot of those jokes are true for me, simply because my wife is just that awesome. However, I have corrupted her a little.

  6. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by Seek View Post
    How many men does it take to open a beer?
    None. It should be opened when she brings it.
    -------------------------------------------------------------------
    Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
    Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.
    --------------------------------------------------------------------
    Why do women have smaller feet than men?
    It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows
    Them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
    -------- --------------------------------------- --------------------
    How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
    When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me..."
    -------------------------------------------------------------------
    How do you fix a woman's watch?
    You don't. There is a clock on the oven.
    -------------------------------------------------------------------
    Why do men pass gas more than women?
    Because women can't shut up long enough to
    Build up the required pressure.
    -------------------------------------------------------------------
    If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
    The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
    -------------------------------------------------------------------
    What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?
    A woman who won't do what she's told
    -------------------------------------------------------------------
    I married a Miss Right.
    I just didn't know her first name was Always.
    -------------------------------------------------------------------
    Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%.
    It's called a Wedding Cake.
    ---------------------------------------------! ----------------------
    Why do men die before their wives?
    They want to.


    Quote Originally Posted by tammietailgator View Post
    Just one question? Are you gay? not that it matters, but just curious
    What are you really trying to say here tammie?

  7. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by Seek View Post
    To be honest with your question, and I am sure it is not a popular opinion. I am homophobic. I easily turn up a lip to the obvious flamer and become uncomfortable around them. I don't try to be, they are nice people but I just can't help it.

    That being said I am happily married with a 3 year old die hard Chiefs son with one in the oven, due by year end. A lot of those jokes are true for me, simply because my wife is just that awesome. However, I have corrupted her a little.
    I was kidding!!

    This is a joke forum isn't it??

  8. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by tammietailgator View Post
    I was kidding!!

    This is a joke forum isn't it??
    I know you were joking. That is why I stated To Answer your questions seriously. That is one prejudice I can't get over. I have tried very hard too.

  9. #18
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    Women think their special because they can fake an orgasm for a relationship. Big deal... Men can fake a relationship for an orgasm.
    Thanks for all the yards, TDs, and memories, Priest!

  10. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by m0ef0e View Post
    Women think their special because they can fake an orgasm for a relationship. Big deal... Men can fake a relationship for an orgasm.

  11. #20
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    BearCountryWarning.jpg

    This may be a noob momement but lets see if this attachment works.

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