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Thread: The Chiefs Crowd Official Joke Thread

  1. #1
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    Default The Chiefs Crowd Official Joke Thread

    There is a chiefs picture forum. Why not a Joke Forum? It is always a pain trying to weed out all of the jokes in a single thread specially when there are thread whores who swurve the thread.

  2. #571
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    How do you starve an Obama supporter??
    It's really very simple, just hide their food stamps under their work shoes.
    http://www.chiefscrowd.com/forums/image.php?type=sigpic&userid=1540&dateline=1380047  325]

  3. #572
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    I was talking to a guy in the line at the store. The conversation got around to wives, and he said he had been widowed three times. I said "Three wives, all dead and buried?" He said "Yes."
    "What happened to the first one?"
    "Poison Mushrooms."
    "What happened to the second one?"
    "Poison Mushrooms."
    "And the third?"
    "Fractured skull."
    "How did that happen?"
    "She wouldn't eat the Poison Mushrooms."

    Women who behave,rarely make history.

  4. #573
    Member Since
    Feb 2009
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    Sydney, Australia
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    Default


  5. #574
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    SE Kansas
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    Default

    SWEATS!!!!!!!!!

    Good to see you!!!

  6. #575
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    ALASKA
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    Hi SWEETS. Long time no see. Too bad about your 9ers. They easily could have been San Fran Six-0 this year.


  7. #576
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    the cure for fat lazy politicians

    http://www.chiefscrowd.com/forums/image.php?type=sigpic&userid=1540&dateline=1380047  325]

  8. #577
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    2 QUARTERS or a DOLLAR BILL
    A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer, 'This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you.' The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, 'Which do you want, son?'


    The boy takes the quarters and leaves the dollar. 'What did I tell you?' said the barber. 'That kid never learns!'


    Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store & says ; 'Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?'

    The boy licked his cone and replied, 'Because the day I take the dollar, the game's over!'



    How true that is.
    Last edited by tornadospotter; 05-24-2012 at 12:45 AM.

  9. #578
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    Quote Originally Posted by tornadospotter View Post
    2 QUARTERS or a DOLLAR BILL
    A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer, 'This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you.' The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, 'Which do you want, son?'


    The boy takes the quarters and leaves the dollar. 'What did I tell you?' said the barber. 'That kid never learns!'


    Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store & says ; 'Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?'

    The boy licked his cone and replied, 'Because the day I take the dollar, the game's over!'
    LOL!!! Nice!

  10. #579
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    Default Official Democrat National Convention Schedule

    This was just released, the Official Schedule for the Democrat National Convention in Charlotte NC, Sept 4-6, 2012:
    Democratic National Convention Schedule

    4:00 PM – Opening Flag Burning Ceremony
    4:05 PM – Singing of "G_D___ America" led by Rev. Jeremiah Wright
    4:10 PM – Pledge of Allegiance to Obama

    4:15 PM – Ceremonial 'I hate America' led by Michelle Obama
    4:30 PM – Tips on Dodging Sniper Fire – Hillary Clinton
    4:45 PM –Al Sharpton Leads Castration Choir in Singing "Great Balls of Fire"

    5:00 PM – UFO Abduction Survival – Joe Biden
    5:30 PM – Eliot Spitzer Speaks on "Family Values" via Satellite
    5:45 PM – Tribute to All 57 States

    6:00 PM – Joe Biden Delivers 100,000-Word Speech Featuring 23-Minute Question and 2-Hour Answer
    8:30 PM – Airing of Grievances by the Clintons
    9:00 PM – Bill Clinton Delivers Rousing Endorsement of Obama Girl

    9:15 PM – Tribute Film to Freedom Fighters at Gitmo – Michael Moore
    9:45 PM – Personal Finance Seminar - Charlie Rangell
    10:00 PM – Denunciation of Bitter Gun Owners

    10:30 PM – Ceremonial Waving of White Flag for IRAQ, & Afghanistan
    11:00 PM – Obama Energy Plan Symposium/Tire Gauge Demonstration
    11:15 PM – Free Gov. Blagojevich rally

    11:30 PM – Obama Accepts Tony and Latin Grammy Awards
    11:45 PM – Feeding of the Delegates with 5 Loaves and 2 Fish – Obama Presiding
    12:00 AM – Official Nomination of Obama by Bill Maher

    12:01 AM – Obama Accepts Nomination, declares that the Kenyan thing was a distraction, he was really born in Bethelehem

    12:05 AM – Celestial Choirs Sing
    3:00 AM – Biden Delivers Acceptance Speech
    http://www.chiefscrowd.com/forums/image.php?type=sigpic&userid=1540&dateline=1380047  325]

  11. #580
    Member Since
    Jul 2011
    Location
    Topeka< KS
    Posts
    11,796

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by kcvet View Post
    This was just released, the Official Schedule for the Democrat National Convention in Charlotte NC, Sept 4-6, 2012:
    Democratic National Convention Schedule

    4:00 PM – Opening Flag Burning Ceremony
    4:05 PM – Singing of "G_D___ America" led by Rev. Jeremiah Wright
    4:10 PM – Pledge of Allegiance to Obama

    4:15 PM – Ceremonial 'I hate America' led by Michelle Obama
    4:30 PM – Tips on Dodging Sniper Fire – Hillary Clinton
    4:45 PM –Al Sharpton Leads Castration Choir in Singing "Great Balls of Fire"

    5:00 PM – UFO Abduction Survival – Joe Biden
    5:30 PM – Eliot Spitzer Speaks on "Family Values" via Satellite
    5:45 PM – Tribute to All 57 States

    6:00 PM – Joe Biden Delivers 100,000-Word Speech Featuring 23-Minute Question and 2-Hour Answer
    8:30 PM – Airing of Grievances by the Clintons
    9:00 PM – Bill Clinton Delivers Rousing Endorsement of Obama Girl

    9:15 PM – Tribute Film to Freedom Fighters at Gitmo – Michael Moore
    9:45 PM – Personal Finance Seminar - Charlie Rangell
    10:00 PM – Denunciation of Bitter Gun Owners

    10:30 PM – Ceremonial Waving of White Flag for IRAQ, & Afghanistan
    11:00 PM – Obama Energy Plan Symposium/Tire Gauge Demonstration
    11:15 PM – Free Gov. Blagojevich rally

    11:30 PM – Obama Accepts Tony and Latin Grammy Awards
    11:45 PM – Feeding of the Delegates with 5 Loaves and 2 Fish – Obama Presiding
    12:00 AM – Official Nomination of Obama by Bill Maher

    12:01 AM – Obama Accepts Nomination, declares that the Kenyan thing was a distraction, he was really born in Bethelehem

    12:05 AM – Celestial Choirs Sing
    3:00 AM – Biden Delivers Acceptance Speech
    Hilarious! i could actually see MOST of these really happening!
    ***Official Chiefs Crowd Game Thread Starter***

    This space is reserved for something that has nothing whatsoever to do with MatthewsChiefs. (Whoever THAT is!)

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