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Thread: The Chiefs Crowd Official Joke Thread

  1. #1
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    Default The Chiefs Crowd Official Joke Thread


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    There is a chiefs picture forum. Why not a Joke Forum? It is always a pain trying to weed out all of the jokes in a single thread specially when there are thread whores who swurve the thread.

  2. #651
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    Quote Originally Posted by kcvet View Post
    I just finished downloading the entire internet

    I must get a faster computer.

  3. #652
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    duh



    Hey, no child left behind right?
    Last edited by Chiefster; 07-11-2013 at 07:50 PM.
    trust but verify
    http://www.chiefscrowd.com/forums/image.php?type=sigpic&userid=1540&dateline=1380047  325]

  4. #653
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    Default This Thread has fallen to disuse. Time to bring some action to it


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    The Affordable Golf Club Act


    New Law....If you have old golf clubs....you can keep your golf clubs....until April 2014



    The administration has passed a new law titled: "The Affordable Golf Club Act" declaring that every citizen must purchase a new set of golf clubs, before April 2014.




    This law has been passed, because until now, typically only the wealthy or financially responsible have been able to purchase new golf clubs without the assistance of their government.



    This new law ensures that every American can now have "affordable" golf clubs of their own, because everyone is equally entitled to new golf clubs. And if you want to keep the golf clubs you already have, you can do that, until April 2014.



    These affordable golf clubs will cost from $1,000 to $3,000 each depending on your income level. This does not include taxes, pull cart, electric cart fees, green fees, membership fees, balls, tees, gloves, range finders, storage fees, maintenance, or repair costs.



    In order to make sure everyone participates and purchases their affordable golf clubs, the costs of owning golf clubs will increase 50% each year up to 400% by year 2018. This way, wealthy people will pay more for something that other people don't want or can't afford to maintain. People who can't afford or refuse to maintain their golf clubs will be fined. However, children under the age of 26 can use their parentsí golf clubs until they turn 27 at which time they must purchase their own golf clubs.



    If you don't want or think you don't need golf clubs, you are still required to buy them. If you refuse to buy a set or make claims that you can't afford them, you will be fined $800 until you purchase a set or face imprisonment.



    People living in farming areas, ghettos, inner cities, Wyoming, or areas with no access to golf courses are not exempt. Age, health, prior experience or no experience are not acceptable excuses for not buying, maintaining, and using your golf clubs.



    A government review board that doesn't know the difference between a hook and a slice will decide everything. This includes when, where, how often and for what purposes you can use your golf clubs along with how many people can ride in your golf cart. The board will also determine if participants are too old or not healthy enough to be able to use their golf clubs.



    They will also decide if your golf clubs have outlived their usefulness or if you must purchase specific accessories, like a range finder with slope adjustment or a newer and more expensive set of golf clubs.



    Those that can afford memberships at expensive golf country clubs will be required to buy memberships. If you are already a member and you like your membership you can keep your membership. After April 2014, a different country club will be assigned for you to purchase a membership.



    Government officials are exempt from this new law as they and their families and some of their friends and a few of their friends friends can obtain golf clubs at taxpayers expense.



    The IRS has hired an additional 124,500 agents to investigage abuse and enforce the Affordable Golf Club Act.





  5. #654
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    A man got on the bus with both of his front trouser pockets full of golf balls and sat down next to a beautiful blonde.
    The puzzled blonde kept looking at him and his bulging pockets.
    Finally, after many glances from her, he said, "It's golf balls."
    The blonde continued to look at him for a very long time, thinking deeply about what he had said.
    After several minutes, not being able to contain her curiosity any longer, she asked,
    "Does it hurt as much as tennis elbow ?"
    trust but verify
    http://www.chiefscrowd.com/forums/image.php?type=sigpic&userid=1540&dateline=1380047  325]

  6. #655
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    A friend of mine took his wife to a baseball game, she knew nothing about the game, so he tried to explain the game to her as they watched. A batter hit's the ball and runs to first and my friend jumps up and shouts "RUN, RUN, RUN!!!" and his wife asked why the batter had to run. He explained that if the batter hit's the ball he has to get to first base before he gets thrown out. All was going well, the two of them enjoying the game, when one player got up to bat, several pitches were thrown, then the batter threw his bat towards the dugout and started walking to first base. My friends wife looked at him with a puzzled look and said, why is he walking to first base? My friend replied, because he has four balls, she jumped up all happy and shouted, strut you stud strut!

    ...I had a couple of minutes so I thought I'd sneak a post reply!


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  8. #657
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    trust but verify
    http://www.chiefscrowd.com/forums/image.php?type=sigpic&userid=1540&dateline=1380047  325]

  9. #658
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    trust but verify
    http://www.chiefscrowd.com/forums/image.php?type=sigpic&userid=1540&dateline=1380047  325]

  10. #659
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    can't fix stupid

    Last edited by Chiefster; 03-25-2014 at 10:41 PM.
    trust but verify
    http://www.chiefscrowd.com/forums/image.php?type=sigpic&userid=1540&dateline=1380047  325]

  11. #660
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    trust but verify
    http://www.chiefscrowd.com/forums/image.php?type=sigpic&userid=1540&dateline=1380047  325]

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